He must be their most interesting patient

Another all-day Dad Fest today, filled with doctors and nurses and waiting rooms. Woo hoo!

Before we could get into the hospital for an outpatient procedure, we had to sit down with the woman in the admitting department so she could put my dad's information into the system. So, she starts off asking for all of the standard information...name... address... telephone...  date of birth... and then she says, "religious preference?"

My dad looks up at the ceiling, leans over on his cane, takes a deep breath and says, "Well, that's complicated."

Oh no.

I jump in to head off a lecture and say, "You just have to pick one."

"Well, okay," he says. After thinking for longer than I am sure anyone has ever thought about that question in an admitting department of a hospital, he says, "Unitarian Universalist." The woman searches through her list. No Unitarian. She says, "We have Catholic, Protestant, Lutheran..."

"No, not Lutheran," my dad says. "They have it all wrong."

"Can't you just say Protestant?" I ask. "That's pretty broad."

"I'm not a Protestant!" my dad says, indignant. "Besides, how can you not have Unitarian Universalist? They're Universal."

"I can just put Christian," the woman says helpfully.

"Christians don't know anything about Christ," my dad says. "They never understood what He was talking about. They don't even understand The Bible!"

"Dad. You just have to pick one," I say.

"Moravian," he answers. "Some of my family was Moravian."

"Do you have Moravian in there?" I ask the woman. I know she doesn't.

"No, no Moravian... wait... hey, I found Unitarian!"

Thank God.

"Okay, Unitarian," my dad says, waving his hand at her. "They got it wrong, too."

The woman quickly clicks it into the computer before he can change his mind.


(Thanks to Nana for watching Ellie! You're the best!!!)